At VBL I like to think that we are a "full service" lodge. From cleaning your fish, to removing hooks from your head, to giving you the Heimlich Maneuver......we do it all. This summer I was called on once again to perform an experimental procedure on the Professor after he foolishly slammed a car door on his fingers (well, that's the story he tells). In order to relieve the pressure and throbbing pain there was only one alternate.....get out the drill!
The Professor was pretty brave after the first finger.......actually pretty cocky would be a better description.
On to finger number two..................do I sense that the "bravado" has seeped away?
Oh, yeah................
Is it the sight of blood........or the eerie feeling of the drill bit going in?
The pressure is relieved.........the patient lives!
The aftermath........the Professor in an orgasmic state! Another Happy Ending at Vermilion Bay Lodge!
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ReplyDeleteHi Folks...Giving Gord the opportunity to drill through my fingernails was truly an unforgettable experience. A small crowd of friends and family kept encouraging Gord to drill faster and deeper. They chanted and cheered as the blood spurted. I found this to be quite disconcerting. The pain of the drill bit piercing into the nail bed was just what you might expect--exquisite.
ReplyDeleteHowerver, the proceedure relieved the pressure in my two fingers, which felt like they were about to explode. The two shots of Canadian whiskey that Susanne supplied me began the healing process which continues today, one month after the mishap.
I'm grateful for Gord's drilling skills. However, I can't recommend this proceedure unless you have a serious problem (like mine) or strong masochistic desires. Gord stands ready if you do.
Fear not, I have special ordered some ultra fine cobalt tipped bits for the 2011 door slamming season. I will stand ready for thee........
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ReplyDeleteDamn it this new browser is crapping my post.
ReplyDeleteOK let's try again! 3rd time is a charm.
Gord, you should have a 2011 Door Slam Madness week.
You could give a gold plated drill bit to the person who gets the most blood under their finger nails via a good door slam on the hand! Truly a manly sport with no slot sizes or limits.
I see it is starting to dip into the 20s there at VBL in the evenings now. Stay warm this Winter and have a good one.
I agree Neil, that would be a manly sport! We could even up the anti by using bamboo shoots to gently slip under the offending fingernail.....
ReplyDeleteOn second thought, let's just stick with the fishing....
I feel the pain... So this is what happens to one who has many degrees and becomes a professor?
ReplyDeleteJust kidding we are all human,but man that looks painful.
I think Gord enjoyed this procedure..
Maybe we call him DR. Bastable now?
I smell a rat. Most VBL regulars know that the professor is a one handed wizard. These photoshopped pictures seem to indicate that the professor has two hands. I'm not buying it.
ReplyDeleteI'm going to go out on a limb and guess that another bottle of brandy fell off the truck either before the procedure or the "door incident"?
ReplyDeleteThis post has been removed by the webmaster because the author has consumed too much of his home brew.
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